My new part-time job

I've got myself a new part-time job. It's not glamorous. And it doesn't pay. In fact, I'm paying for the privilege. I started treatment at the Fibromyalgia and Fatigue Centers.

The very best part of today's first visit was that I didn't feel like I had to apologize for having all this nebulous "stuff" wrong with me. Everyone at the center, from the doctor to the office coordinator, is there specifically to help people like me. The patients are all people like me. You can't know the sense of relief that brings unless you've been to doctors who've said "I can't find anything - are you under stress?" or those who've said, "well, you've got fibromyalgia - there's nothing I can do for you". At this center there are doctors and other health care workers who are saying, "yes, you have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue. We can help."

The downside, and there always is one, is that I'm going to have to organize my life around taking care of myself. Just managing the transition off old medications and onto the new ones is going to take a lot of mental energy. When I think about adding supplements and office visits for other treatments into the mix, it's almost overwhelming.

That's why I am going to have to look at this as a part-time job. I show up for work and do the things that need to get done. I owe it to myself to have at least that much commitment to managing my illness and recovery.

Today's appointment was long and expensive. Frankly, I'm exhausted and more than a little freaked out by the cost and and the thought of coordinating all these new things into my life. Still, that glimmer of hope is shining bright. Thank goodness for that.